UNlearning
I hope that everyone has started to decompress and detox from the holiday season. We really bulk up on toxins during the holidays: cookies, family, more cookies, flu viruses, wine, spiked eggnog, champagne, fatty foods, noise pollution, and human pollution. The holidays can be a little toxic; and we really need to make the active choice to get rid of all that ickiness.
Although the holiday season most certainly takes the cake for the highest toxin intake in the shortest period of time, we take on a lot of toxins throughout our lives. We don't just take in pollution and junk foods, we also take on toxic energy. Unbeknownst to some, I am a nutritionist. Nutritionist have a tendency to be pretty geeky about detoxing. We’re hyper aware of all the junk people consume. Humans consume more junk than you can imagine, more than health practitioners tell you sometimes...we don’t have enough time. I can guarantee if most of you knew what I knew about what goes into people’s mouths...your mouths...your jaw would likely drop. We take on a lot of toxins.
Also unbeknownst to some, I am Holistic EFT Practitioner. In a nutshell, EFT is an acupressure based system to rid your body of a different type of toxins: emotional toxins. Toxins aren’t just limited to the metals, pesticides, preservatives, and poison in our food! We also take on, and carry toxic emotions and beliefs. Since I can get pretty geeky about about detoxing, I'm an advocate for detoxing negative emotions and beliefs too.
The tricky part about toxins that aren’t of the consumable or breathable variety, is that you can’t really move them through your system with a juice cleanse or activated charcoal. It’s true that emotional toxins do present physically; but you can’t whisk them away solely by physical means. Although, that'd be fucking incredible. Detoxing from toxic emotions can be taken care of using EFT; and toxic beliefs can be taken care of by UNLEARNING.
That’s right, folks- UNlearning.
We’re so obsessed on acquiring things: money, shoes, jobs, spouses, cake, information. We don’t often consider getting rid of things. We hold onto to things even when they are too heavy to carry. I used to be the President of the “Hoarding Everything Club”; but over the years I’ve had a string of interesting events that have encouraged me to throw stuff away. I have thrown physical things away, people away, emotions away, environmental toxins away, and limiting beliefs away. I love it. I LOVE UNlearning. I love UNlearning all the limiting beliefs and lies that society fed me as I grew up; and every time I UNlearn something, I break a cycle. Breaking cycles is a superhero power we all possess.
I really encourage everyone to get on this UNlearning band wagon- it’s a great time, very cathartic.
So let’s really quickly go over some common lessons and beliefs that we all need to UNlearn; and perhaps we can all contribute to breaking some cycles, so new cycles of human evolution can follow.
I can’t succeed unless (...)
I have a lot of money.
I get a primo education.
My family says I can.
My zodiac chart says I can.
The time is right.
Have you ever thought those thoughts, and watched yourself go nowhere?
The only thing that will stop you from succeeding is not trying, and/or negative thinking.
I’m going to have a hard time because (...)
I’m a girl.
I’m a boy.
I’m black.
I’m white.
I’m ugly.
I’m pretty.
I have 6 fingers…
Although some things are authentically more challenging due to a physical appearance or physical attribute, you’re not doing yourself any favors convincing yourself you’re unable to get somewhere because of it.
This one is subconscious: I have to be afraid of things to be safe.
I have to be afraid of burglars.
I have to be afraid of gang members on the street.
I have to be afraid of kidnappers.
I have to be afraid of sharks.
Okay, so you don’t. You don’t have to be afraid of anything. In fact fear activates the adrenaline center in our brain, and makes us virtually incapable of rational thinking. Fear is not the same as awareness. Awareness is was contributes to our safety.
I have to believe in what my ______ believes.
My family
My community
My friends
My spouse
As a seasoned black sheep, I assure you that you do not. You are your own person, and you don’t have to melt like wax into other people. This existence isn’t a melody, nor a harmony really...it’s a symphony.
Things should be, or go, a certain way.
"Should" and "should not" are about as valid as Santa. They don't exist. There is simply was "is" and what "is not"; and what "is" and what "is not" doesn't have a negative or positive meaning until we assign one. Nothing outside of scientific law SHOULD go any particular way. All the "shoulds" in the world make us frustrated and judgmental of others and ourselves. It’s bad ju ju. It’s important to have structure; but it’s more important to not have expectations….they’re just disappointments in training.
I can’t. They can’t.
All the things we have to UNlearn to be peaceful, happy, and successful all revolve around “cannots”, “should nots”, and fear. Additionally we must unlearn all the lies we were taught….like Pocahontas living happily ever after….so uncool. However, the straight up flat out lies we were told is another blog entirely...it’s a series of blogs...a series of novels. Maybe when I’m old and crotchety, I will write that novel series: “All The Lies Society Fed You: Volumes 1-347”
I can’t meditate properly
I can’t focus
I shouldn’t speak my mind
I shouldn’t take this risk
Ditching all these mind toxins is an easy fix. All you need is a healthy dose of awareness, the will to break cycles, and the desire to move forward.
Create the intention to observe yourself, and catch yourself in all your “I can’t, they can’t, I shouldn’t, they shouldn’t, Fear this, fear that” moments. Every time you catch yourself in an "I CAN’T" moment...write down that experience somewhere. Plug it in your phone if you have to. Spend some time (in a quiet place) working on UNlearning it with yourself; and let that garbage go. Ask yourself, is it true that I CAN’T do that? Is it true that I SHOULDN’T do that? Is it true they can’t do something, or should not do something? Is it TRUE?! Or is it just my opinion? It’s probably just your opinion. Opinions aren’t facts. If we could convince ¼ of the nation to really accept and practice that opinions are not facts, the environment of the nation would change overnight.
And when you convince yourself to accept that opinions aren’t facts, your life can change overnight. What if you replaced all the can’ts with cans? What if you took away the "mustn’ts" and "shouldn’ts", the fears?
What if you unlearned everything holding you back? What’s the best that could happen?!
I’ll leave you with a poem from my favorite poet, Shel Silverstein- a man of simple yet profound words:
Listen to the mustn'ts, child. Listen to the don'ts.
Listen to the shouldn'ts, the impossibles, the won'ts.
Listen to the never haves, then listen close to me...
Anything can happen, child.
Anything can be.
Anything can happen.
